We blissfully drive away from the gas pump and realize we forgot to enter the station and pay for our fill up. Our cart is overflowing with groceries at the local supermarket and only after they’ve all been rung up, or scanned through as the case may be, do we realize we have no cash, no checkbook, no credit card with us. We are singing at the top of our lungs in church, making a joyful noise unto the Lord as it were, and discover the rest of the congregation is on verse three and we’re belting out verse four. It’s icy on the sidewalk and we make a less than graceful descent to the concrete only to discover we are not alone - there are dozens of folks on the street who may have witnessed our fall. Oi.
The list could go on and on. As humans, we like to be reasonably thought of by strangers and acquaintances alike, don’t we? And when we bloop we blush. Or I do anyway.
I’ve been caught in the act of foolishness more times than I care to remember, but the most recent one is still causing me to chuckle and shake my head at myself. Catching your britches on your own pitchfork is always a humbling, and after the fact amusing, experience.
In reality I could blame it on the grandkids, well at least partially. We sing a lot when we’re together. Snatches of tunes we like from a movie we’ve just seen, or a song we’ve just heard, or whatever pops into our collective heads. Usually one of us starts in and the other two take it up. (It’s the same with movie quotes and is generational in my family, thus difficult to resist.) On Wednesday past our collective tune was “Love Shack,” originally sung by the B-52s and released about 30 years ago. We’d been belting it out off and on all morning and it became stuck on the jukebox in my head. Should I change jukebox to playlist here? Do the younger set with their devices and their smartphones even know what a jukebox is? In any case it was there in my head and not about to be ousted.
We ventured outside to get our bikes from the garage for a little spin. I was rinsing a bin at one of the outdoor faucets singing the aforementioned “Love Shack”, though not real loudly thank goodness, when I turned to find the UPS man not 10 feet away. Both the kids were laughing. They said they’d yelled that he was approaching, but with the water running and the singing to myself, along with my naturally poor hearing, I was oblivious to their warning. So there I was. Caught in the act by a stranger. He handed me a package and went back to his truck - which was parked on the road rather than in the driveway - rather quickly, I thought. But maybe he’s normally a fast walker.
By then I could only imagine what thoughts were running through his head. He was young and who knows if he’s ever even heard the song since it was originally released in 1989 or so. Probably thinks I’m one of those old gals stricken with some ailment – dementia, Alzheimers – he might have gone home and told his wife/significant other, “One of my deliveries was kinda odd today. There was this old lady. She looked pretty normal, had on capris and a t-shirt, her hair in two braids sort of like little girls wear and she was singing to herself under her breath. Something about a car that seats about 20 and jukebox money, whatever that is. I peeled out of there quick-like. Hope I never get that route again!”
Or maybe he thought nothing of it. Maybe he’s a “singer” too. Maybe he’s into 80’s music, stranger things have happened. Regardless, it was one of those moments that are embarrassing indeed. Don’t think I’ll be ordering anything needing to be delivered by UPS anytime soon. *sigh.*